Paradise Lost and Found

You would have to have found it to have lost it.

But, unfortunately, I have no such discovery under my belt. Instead, I am forced to live in a hellish civilization that does not suit me in the least. In fact, if one were to look at my life, and everything that I stand for and believe in, they would understand that this place is in fact the exact polar opposite of the ideal location for me. I am in proverbial, and in some cases literal, hell.

And only 28 days to go.

Actually, as I write this, I feel it prudent to point out that this is one of the few points in this trip that I am freed of the basics that compose my hell quite accurately. Computers are a rare and dangerous commodity in this country, like plutonium and fish. In fact, this situation is so rare that I intend to completely ignore Helga on this post and give the readers an unedited copy of my work, both out of the freedom and giddy enjoyment of the moment, and also the timer that ticks beside me as a reminder of the life I am now forced to live.

So, let’s make this quick.

As I arrived from my 36 hour trip in this country, the most prominent thing that hit me, besides the loose chair from the passenger in front of me, was the large amount of people of my age group on the same plane as myself. The entire plane was, as I gazed about me, filled with Italian tourists, students who had come here with the purpose of both learning better English and ‘hooking up’, to coin a phrase.

This is proving to be the only thing keeping me withing the bleary confines of sanity. I’ve never had the chance to analyse an individual with a poor grasp of English, let alone a good grasp of something else. This will surely prove to be a wonderful experience for me. Unfortunately, I have a little difficulty with the interactive requirements of a conversational social environ. In other words, I have no idea how to talk to someone, be they of a fluent or fractured English variant.

This is where you people come in. I ask for something, something important, something that would never have happened under any other circumstance other than being trapped in an isolated hell: I need help socialising, be it on a basic conversational level with a group of my peers or perhaps to strike up a chat with a friendly female for the purpose of study during more intimate moments.

I truly hope that you readers out there can help, what with Helga asleep in another timezone and all. I hope to return to the comforts of technology within the next few days, so I hope you can provide the necessary (organised) data within that time.

Yours Needily,

Crane.